How to Kill a Sex Life

1. Don't schedule it - If both of you are often too busy or tired for sex, try putting it off until...whenever.
2. Watch TV in bed - Let's see what's on Netflix.
3. Don't talk about it - If you've gotten used to not bringing it up, it's going to be much easier to keep it that way.
4. Complain/ Blame - But....you....never....😫
5. Bargain - Okay, we can do it if you go visit my family with me. "Perfect! I'll get my coat."
6. Watch a lot of porn - Nothing can kill a sex life quite like fantasizing about other people, erectile dysfunction, and compartmentalized sexuality.
7. Don't get help - Have you tried crossing your fingers or wishing upon a star?